What's in a name?

Nothing, yet everything. The wondrous amount of weight a single word can carry is baffling to me. I mean, on a plain level, it is just a concoction of random letters that happen to identify me. My character doesn't change with it. My actions aren't influenced by it. Then why the hell does it matter if the majority of people are not able to pronounce it. People suffer from much tragic things. I can live with Impossibly-Pronouncable-Name Syndrome, right? Wrong.

I deemed myself worthy of a prize when I was growing up, for having the most unique name. Give me the Hindi version, and I was confused for a bit, but I was fine. Give the Gujarati version and I was fine. Give me the Telugu version and I was fine. But no one warned me about how effed up the Angrezi version would be. I blame the Americans' incapability to EVER correctly pronounce my name for the low self-confidence and lack of self-esteem I experienced.
"Wait, how do you say that?" "Is it ouajdfoau?" HELL NAW!
I dreaded the day a substitute would proxy for my teachers. They would always compensate for their incompetence by claiming "ooh you have such a beautiful name", "wow, what a cool name."
Then why CAN'T you pronounce it?! I mean, I'm not asking you to build a robot and it is not exactly rocket science.

I thought that I was being too harsh on my life's spectators and that I should give them a break. "Sure," I said, "call me __" or "call me whatever you want." Big mistake. I should never have stooped so low. My judgment was too clouded by my desire to be accepted, be it at the cost of sacrificing the essence that had characterized my being for so long. You can't blame me either. I could physically feel and still feel people avoiding me, purposefully delaying their interaction with me, so that THEY don't suffer the embarassment of mispronouncing my name.

However, it is high time for me to say "THAT'S ENOUGH, GET IT RIGHT BITCH!" For far too long, I have tolerated this misery and I shall bear it nevermore, nevermore. So what if it takes you 50 tries until you learn my name, I will stand over you with a bludgeon and make sure you practice it those 5o times. I will not forego opportunities to establish rapport, make contacts and for lack of a better term, "network," because the audience is too close-minded and too self-absorbed to address me with the correct pronunciation. I don't know if I'm being too adamant and if my mission will be accomplished, but for now, I will take advantage of this glorious name of the Goddess Sita that my grandfather has lovingly bestowed upon me and fight for its honor.
Ohh Gogol Ganguli, you had it easy, my friend, you had it WAY too easy.